"never let your fear...

of striking out keep you from playing the game"

i love this quote. it's so where i am in my life right now. actually it's where i've been for a long time. always a fear of not fitting in or being rejected somehow, so i keep people at arm's length. i shut down and completely withdraw because it's easier for me to just not be in a new environment rather than risk being hurt. that fear is always there for me, hence my inactive social life, the shyness, etc. sometimes i wonder how i even function normally, but i do. am i abnormal, lol, some might say yes but i don't think so. there have been numerous times where i have told myself that i was going to let go of the fear and just be. but it's so hard to do that. i'm working on it, but i have a more work to do, i don't want this fear to totally consume my life and i'm tired of living with it. people can tell you to just do something or just be something, but i've been this way for most of my life and as ya'll know (from my previous blog) dealing with change is not my forte. so...i'm going to give it a try again and hopefully i'll see different results.