so glad

that i'm comfortable (somewhat) with who i am. last night i had dinner with a "friend" actually an associate. i believe this person is a genuine person, but honestly, if i wasn't as comfortable with myself i would have been truly offended at some of the things she said to me. first off, we were going to a step show together, but she wanted to get something to eat. i told her that i had to go home and change (basically cause it was a really casual friday for me). when she saw me, she said..."oh no, you can't go with me looking like that." now, i realize i was really, really dressed down but i also had no intention of going anywhere repping my org looking like i did. if i didn't learn anything else in during my process, i learned that when i am repping my sorority, i must look good because i am no longer 1shylady, once i became a member i became 1shylady "the xyz." that was the first thing. secondly, i kept being told that i never leave my house to do anything fun. i think that's relative, because everyone's definition of fun is different. i realize that i need to get out more, but i don't know too many people here yet, so i do other things that i enjoy. the third thing was that she was i was reserved, but in an uptight way. i really tried to explain that i'm just quiet, but once i get to know someone i open up. there's nothing wrong with being reserved and quiet. but i hope she doesn't mistake my reserved, quiet nature as weakness, because i'm not weak. fourth thing, as we are leaving the restaurant, she sees my bag, see that i have on track pants and sneakers and says that i am way too old to be dressing like that. she then proceeds to try and school me on the lessons of business and dressing professionally. sure, i could've said - dammit, leave me alone, i dress professionally when i want to but today i wasn't feeling it so i didn't. but i didn't say anything, i just let her talk. i like this person, but somethings that i've witnessed about her just makes me feel like i don't want to be around her. but, in trying to be "my sister's keeper" i will continue to make attempts to get to know this person and understand where she is coming from and why she is like she is.

but, in the end, i'm so glad that i am who i am and i like who i am. sure sometimes i have bad days, but for the most part 1shylady is the isht!! :)